sincere question that i've wondered for a couple of years now

why can't things just go the way they're supposed to?
ever?

picture of a car

in a funk today and don't know why.

downtown

i am obviously going a bit crazy with the instagram app. it's probably a sweet phase but i'm happy for now. i posted a few of my favorites on my photo blog.

yesterday i wanted to take off to vegas for a few days which would have been a mistake, so i improvised and drove to downtown salt lake to spend a day by myself. i ate sushi at a park and relaxed in the sun. later i joined hundreds of others at the gateway mall, and then ended the day by hiking ensign peak for the sunset (which was gorgeous). i met a posse of cool people because they asked me to take a picture of their group and i ended up convincing them to do a bunch of silhouette shots against the beautiful sky.  there was a married couple in the group and they asked for a couple of pics alone. i directed and took a silhouette shot of them hugging and the guy kissing her forehead. she was so happy when she saw it she hugged me:) it made me happy.

burn

^the only physical thing that's left of the 8 page story that changed my life.

update on my life

i spent some much-needed quality time with my best friend and her husband the past couple of days up in logan. it was so fantastic! we ate at cafe rio with free meal punch cards we've been saving for an outing together. we also watched TV, and stayed up all night talking.

the drive up to logan was gorgeous:

i'm at work right now, i work graveyard part time at a rehab house. for some reason tonight i've been thinking a lot about my life over the past year and a half. my life has gone exactly opposite of the way i thought it was going to go, back in fall 2009.

my mind has been so unfocused for a long time. i feel like i'm in a fog, floating through life. i don't know why my brain is so weird, i just can't hold on to any memories in a solid way. i remember things the way you remember a movie- disconnected.

i've been spending a lot of time with my friend jonathan. speaking of jonathan, he bought a motorcycle. doesn't he look like he belongs on this bike? i'm excited for him to get it all fixed up and take me on a ride:)

i took sophia and evan to the park a few days ago. they played and i hung upside down (or "up eyes down" as sophia says) for a while. the world looked really cool so i took pictures:

the weather was decent for a day or two last week and so i played with sophia in the backyard for a bit. i let her take a few pictures with my big camera. isn't she so freaking cute? ahhh:

well that's all for now, unless inspiration hits me again in the next 3 hours before i get off work. :)

computer solution

i have to pinch the bottom right corner of my screen so it doesn't do this:

that makes it hard to work because i need my right hand, so today i found a solution with a clothespin:

so ghetto:) the reality of my job is less than glamorous.

purge of random thoughts

i am in a slump and falling behind in a lot of things, work in particular. i was really sick last weekend and am still recovering but i didn't have time to be sick, especially it's taking too long to get myself back into life.

my friend jonathan has been tempting me to go on a spontaneous road trip at least once a week over the past while and it's taking everything in me not to just abandon everything for a few days and hit the road.. especially when he says we can go wherever i want. AHHHHHHHHHH. california! washington state! oregon!!! las vegas!!!

i'm planning that road trip actually, drive up to washington, check it out to see if i really want to move there next year. then i want to head over to oregon, make it to the coast and then drive down the coast of california. i plan on looping back up to utah through las vegas and staying for a couple of days to party and also hit the spa at the mandalay place hotel. i'd love to go this year, but unless a financial miracle happens, that's not likely. i'm going to completely plan it anyways.

it's SUMMER! today is HOT (for utah- hush, texas people) and there's no going back! i will kill something if it snows again before october. just bought a little swim suit today to celebrate. can't wait for the pools to open in a couple of weeks!! possible bear lake trip with friends is in my future as well:D

i'm trying to figure out how to improve my photography business. i have ideas, its just implementation that's hard. i have a vision of what i'd like it to become, i just am not totally sure how to get there.

i took the kids to the park a few days ago and told them not to go to the lake by the park. i lost track of sophia and when i realized i didn't see her at the playground i started running towards the lake. when i got to her she had completely stripped and was walking towards the water. i shamefully gathered her up amidst the other people down there who'd been wondering where the adult responsible for her was. yeah, that was me.